What is my destiny, why am I here? I will ask God I do not know. Otherwise I want to die again. Has an experience with something?
Yes! I found the meaning / determination of my life in a life in / with Jesus. Read time in John or any other book in the Bible. God longs for you and would like to talk to your heart - that's why he is happy if you ask him.
God wants to give you joy and his love. If you trust him, he will show you and you can go together with him your life. He wants to be your father and lead you.
The words in the Bible can sometimes take a flash, encourage, exhort, be omission. If you meet something, think about it again and do not reject it directly - God can give you all your questions to give you answers. We do not have to know everything - that's nI mean the goal, but the relationship with him, but God wants us to know him and his son. He calls eternal life. Can not imagine anything better and wish you from the heart that you can find him and recognize His love for you and invites him to your life.
All the best to you!
PS: I know a woman with YouTube, who started with 60 years, to start Vision for Africa and has an enthusiasm for God that is very contagious. After her husband had died, she asked himself the same question as you. Is that all or there is more. And then God has sent her to Africa and there she has helped her for 20 years thousands of children from poverty. Here she tells her life story:
His determination in life can be found, if one turns on his brain - think about what lies and what is not - and then acting accordingly.
Such a finding can also take and rarely adheses ad hoc. In, patience is a good companion.
With "fate" that, of course, has nothing to do - if there is something like "destiny" at all or how to define it.
I will ask God I do not know.
God has given you a brain and a mind - use it.